So, I tend to run Firefox as a web browser, and it has a lovely little Firefox search toolbar that I use often. I never bother going to Google directly, since I can just search there. On occasion, I’ll do a more verbal search — rather than searching for just key terms, it seems like searching for a phrase helps. So, I was typing out a phrase, and I paused for a moment, when the suggestion system kicked in.
If you haven’t seen this before, try it. Type in a keyword or two, and a list will pop down, suggesting what it thinks you may be looking for. Often with just a couple of keywords, this suggestion system can speed up searching, or possibly help find better keywords. However, when I’m typing a phrase, it’ll go for the phrases people use most often, which can be very amusing. I had started by typing out “How do I get” when the suggestions kicked in. Here’s the top set, as I found the amusing.
- How do I get a passport That seems like a reasonable query, especially since they’re needed for Canadian travel and such.
- How do I get pregnant — I thought they taught that in school.
- How do I get there — Ah, precision.
- How do I get rid of fruit flies — Sorry, got no commentary on this one — they use some sticky yellow stuff here at work.
- How do I get a new social security card — Again, reasonable.
- How do I get you alone — Creepy.
- How do I get on myspace at school — How cute, burgeoning security hackers.
- How do I get a copy of my birth certificate — Not much to say on this one either.
- How do I get you alone lyrics — okay, I guess, maybe the earlier query wasn’t so creepy, but I was very amused by it until I saw this suggestion.
Not the most amusing list ever, I suppose, but I got a kick out of it. Unfortunately, in the process of looking through the suggestions, I also completely forgot what I was actually searching to get. Oops.
Edit: Nearly two hours later, I randomly recalled what I was looking for. I wanted to know how I could get an SMS short code for a particular purpose. They’re way too expensive for anything outside of commercial use, and even then, you’d really have to need one for it to be worth what they’re asking.
I was gonna say “How do I get you alone” is a line from a song by Heart, but then I read the last line so I guess don’t worry about it :)